I don’t remember the exact moment I stopped living
I mean
I was still breathing…just not really alive.
My spinal chord took over for my brain
so I could still walk, eat, swallow blink.
My color was good, my blood pressure just fine,
but somehow, I was not who I used to be inside.
Has that ever happened to you?
I can still ponder but not act out my conclusions.
I still can respond to general mundanity, but I forget my answers.
I know who everyone is, sharp as a tack pounded into the carpet,
but I am not as interested as I was before… and my head hurts.
Nature holds my attention for long periods of time;
the changing sky, the darting birds, seem to mesmerize me.
Has that ever happened to you?
It occurs to me I might be approaching some finality,
although it does seem one could go on forever this way.
I slip through my friends contact lists so they forget to call me.
I slide down out of sight, so although visible, no one seems to see me.
I am thinking this could be progressive and what that actually could mean…
Will I wind up a statue in the entryway, who gets dusted twice a month?
Will I turn into a painting of dull pastels that no one likes to contemplate?
Or will I be a once beloved photograph fallen to the floor of the attic?
In any case, it all seems beyond my control, so I just watch and wait…
Has that ever happened to you?
Karima Hoisan
June 1, 2020
Costa Rica
Digital Rabbit Hole 
Owch, very close to home!
Some days being that statue in the entry way seems like a very attractive prospect.
Excellent and true, as ever.
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Thank you Dale..glad you “enjoyed it” sorry you could relate to it.. Yes but in these chaotic upheaving times., being inside all those layers is, if nothing else, safe.
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Karima, one of your more instilling pennings. I particularly like:
“Nature holds my attention for long periods of time; the changing sky, the darting birds, seem to mesmerize me.”
You’re an exceptionally gifted writer, a trail blazer, an exacting writer!
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Lance, thank you for continuing to read my poetry..Your comments, mean a lot to me, as you know, because I admire your own pennings so much:) It’s true that Nature has always been a salve, and I am lucky to be surrounded by it in every direction. Your comment. once again inspires me to be more prolific….more communicative…even take more chances:)
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Karima, it is an honorable pleasure to your special brand of poetry. And, taking chances is a good thing- it helps us to grow as poets! Thank you for your uplifting thoughts- they do uplift. I wish you the absolute best.
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You nailed something in this flow that at one time I felt intimately; it’s like you ‘lifted’ something out of my experience, yet your words uniquely and descriptively brought it out of the shadows. I truly love how your empathy for the human experience reveals our inner souls and our struggles in such a striking and beautiful way – through your poetic flow. It’s truly a gift and I am forever grateful that you share that gift with all of us ((hugs)).
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Awww sissy, thank you for this intimate comment and shared feelings. Awww you just gave me tears, you make me feel like a real poet, when I begin to doubt myself at times:) Thank you sis for always feeling my words, and for being so inspirationally articulate when describing how you feel them. That’s why you are my sissy-poo for almost 13 years now! Big hugs to you…
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